Thursday, September 9

Go With Your Guts

From the start, if there was one thing I knew about which way this site was going to go it was this: it was in no way to become a diary.

And I've followed my guts, haven't I? - apart from the occasional piece about odd adventures in town and abroad. Jesse's Diets is, I admit, a flashlight on what's rocking my world from week to week, but it's brief. A minute steak.

I followed my gut instinct, and now comes scientific proof (see link) that keeping a diary fucks you up.

What happens? Shit happens. Then you go soft in the head.

As we in the West approach the third anniversary of 9/11, I think we should take stock on how soft we're all getting. Here in London it's the fixation on childhood - and the child's eye perspective - via books (from Booker Prize winners to serial bestsellers) and films; it's the radio dominance of valium rock with its neutered lyrics; it's the fact that it's not enough to announce on the news that there's going to be a statement from Buckingham Palace in the near future, but that a reporter has to be standing outside the Palace to restate what the guy back in the studio has just told us, while we all await this statement ... In essence, it's news for dummies. Where's the beef? Nowhere.

And it's just about the whole output of the post-Diana heart-embossed ITV network - though a friend tells me that it is what all Italian TV is like. (But then this didn't surprise me: Italy is a land where the average twenty-five year old male owns more pairs of shoes than books. Oh, and that's not one of my petty surmises - that's a fact jacked. What they get as a result is a load of overly smart-dressed men - and bo for a culture.)

So no, I'm not saying we're completely fucked; rather, as Bob Dylan put it in song (his best?) back in 1997: "It's not dark yet, but it's getting there."

There's a softness in the head apparent in other social arenas, such as the knee-jerk anti-war rallies of last year. Then there's the gloopy campaign to replace Tony Blair with Gordon Brown. I've rattled on about those before, so I'll spare you here, though I'll slip in this link to a woman who's most definitely going with her guts (and it also suggests that the stereotypical laid-back image of the Dutch is in itself lazy thinking).

I want us to get back to Seinfeld territory. The moral underscore of that show was the motto no hugging, no learning. Yes, the very opposite of Friends. Now I'm not immune to enjoying a homily - the entire corpus of Jane Austen springs to mind. But, as with her work, I want them to be tough to the core, not wrapped in flimsy material. Yes, the very opposite of Bridget Jones.

My friends, my friends, there's so much yarbles out there to rip into - plenty of jollies for all. Why, just today (via the always wonderfully scandalous Popbitch) comes the news that 'Cave' Man Rooney has been caught diving into a cocaine sandpit. To think that a mere couple of months ago, had England won Euro 2004, he would have been a shoo-in for Sports Personality of the Year; now he's hated - for joining the Scum, and being ghosted in the Sun. And quite right too, on both counts.

Dame Kelly Holmes shall take all the plaudits now. But, if I may whisper this: am I alone in wondering if she dreams of electric sheep?

For the record, my woman of the year has to be Britney Spears. Simply off the scale in entertainment value. I declare her to be the Queen of Rock & Roll. What matter to her is the sanctity of marriage? The Queen says: Kiss my ring. And don't kill the drink, you motherfucker.

Plus: Toxic remains the best pop single released so far this year. Yes. It. Is. C'mon guys, it's even got a Barney Sumner or Robert Smith - take your pick - new wave circa 1979 guitar loop to go with its arabic strings. And, whatever it takes, you just know she's going to look fabulous if she does go through with this second betrothal, which in itself is but an hors d'oeuvre before our new Taylor meets her Burton. You know it makes sense. Me, I can feel it in my guts ...


posted by DD @ 17:03 


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